Vanity
5:43 p.m. 2005-03-10

I'm vain like that.

My teeth are yellow and crooked, my boobs are small, my hair has split ends and looks raggedy, I am out of shape, I smoke too much, I get winded, when I jump up and down my stomach jumps with me, I drink too much caffeine, and my skin is uneven and prone to acne. Admittedly, I am a mess. And this is just in looks. Imagine how badly my personality and intelligence rate. Trust me, I have high standards, I just don't enforce the need to meet them. I have a slacker attitude, and I always have, but I can change that. I can change alot of things, and the things that I can't (such as my small boobs, that is without drastic plastic surgery which isn't going to happen because 1. I'm too poor and 2. I don't really see the need)I can learn to live with. Besides that, all of these things can be changed. By doing these things.

Quit smoking, drink water, cut my hair and get that special soapy shampoo and conditioner and basically buy a shitload of hair stuff(it's an addiction) to keep my hair looking beautiful, wash my face every morning and remember not to touch my face with my hands (it makes it easy to transfer bacteria to your face which causes dirt deep in the skin and out pops acne and other nasty-ness), exercise so I don't feel so sluggish and fat, I brush my teeth quite often but I need to start using mouth wash, and convince my mother to find somewhere so I can finish with my braces. Jesus!That's a lot of vanity, isn't it? It's not just because I want to look pretty, but I want to feel pretty. I'm already decent looking and some even say I'm "hot" (I don't consider that a compliment), but I want to feel good about myself - every day. I'm tired of my friends looking at me and saying that I need to do something about my clothes, makeup, or whatever. It makes me feel like crap, and I don't like it, but they're just being honest and I would never discourage that.

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