7:32 a.m. 2005-04-26
It has been 13 days since I have been going out with D. That means nothing to anyone who may have just wandered onto my site...but it does to me. I like the freshness of a new relationship - the actual effort to try to get to know each other. The first kisses, first hugs, first -- well, first everythings. You're putting your time into someone hoping that they'll reciprocate, and they do and it's wonderful and you start to think of next week, and the week after that, and so on. Then it starts getting long-term. Then it starts getting old. Then you get immensely comfortable with each other and you start to not care what your hair looks like, whether you burp or fart in front of each other, and you often forget that you don't live with each other.
And you know what? With him, it's fine. I don't see him taking me for granted - and I don't really want to compare him to the other relationships I've been in - because he's not them and I really truly care about him. (Not that I didn't the others, especially Steve-o - whom I still love and care about because he's my friend.) He makes me feel really experienced in the sex department considering the fact that he has never done the deed. It took him awhile to approach me and put his arms around me. He makes me so happy already and that's why I'm so scared. What if I ruin this? (But I won't because I'll try my hardest to make it work with him.) What if you disagree on something important? (Damn! We're not married so it's not like we have to argue about finances or anything, but I'm sure we can learn to compromise. About what, I don't know.) Why are you asking yourself rhetorical questions that you don't really need or already know? (Yeah, why am I? I DO NOT KNOW.)
On to other things - my sinuses are acting up. Motherfucker. This room must have dust flying around and up into my poor nasal passages because my nose is leaking (leaking?) heavily and I"m sneezing, and I'm supposed to go out today - don't you love this run-on sentence? Also, this is a completely different subject but I'm extremely random today so the month May is coming up. That's fine and dandy except I'm a poor broke bitch and there are family, friends, and relatives who are expecting some nice presents or at least money for their birthdays. Tiffany's birthday is on the 1st and I fully intend on getting her a card and maybe a gift card, but nothing fancy (-it's not like we even talk anymore.) May 5th is my grandma's birthday. Which is awesome because I love my grandma and she pretty much says everything I get her is nice. Even when she's lying.
And May 23rd is D's birthday. I don't think it's that great of an idea to get him something when I know absolutely nothing of what he likes. Except the fact that he thinks he's a gangster and occasionally "makes out" with boys. I had no idea that homo thugs were so sexy. *sighs* Yeah, this is my life.
/ Design / Dland / Thanx
